So says Mancow Muller, one of the nation's most famous radio personalities and the man who shut down the San Francisco–Oakland Bay Bridge as a political act. Mancow is the creator, writer, and ringmaster of what has been called the "funniest, fastest-moving, and most diverse radio show in history," Mancow's Morning Madhouse, syndicated nationally from Chicago. He has received so many prestigious awards for excellence in radio that his arm is constantly sprained from patting himself on the back. With political commentary, comedy bits, and whatever else comes into his head, Mancow also appears regularly on Fox News Channel's morning program Fox & Friends. And now, in his first book, Dad, Dames, Demons, and a Dwarf, Mancow rushes headlong into an adventure cross-dressed as a memoir.

When Mancow loses his dad -- his number one fan -- to cancer, he has a meltdown, spiraling down Freedom Road on a nonstop death ride: racing the autobahn at breakneck speeds, inhaling Amsterdam's pleasures, narrowly escaping an illegal visit to Castro's Cuba, suffering a near-fatal nervous breakdown, and cavorting under dog piles of women. All of these adventures send him on a mind trip through his past.

Terrorist teachers, hellfire preachers, and jails masquerading as public schools attack his intelligence and independence. But Mancow resists, screaming, "I'm not like everybody else! I'm not another brick for your wall!"

Mancow questions everything! "Do we already live in a police state?" "Must individual spirit be crushed?" "How much is that woman in the window?" "Who will join my fight against dwindling freedoms in this so-called Land of the Free?" "Do you want to get laid?"

Finding his soul again, he discovers a strange new freedom that only members of The Dead Dad's Club can understand. In this, his first humble masterpiece, Mancow wakes people up, makes you laugh, makes you think, makes you feel. Described as "a combination of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, and Don Quixote, but with more sex," Dad, Dames, Demons, and a Dwarf takes you on a journey that kindles your independent spirit and knocks you to the floor with laughter.