"I may or may not have accidentally acquired two boyfriends...

This means i have to be on high beauty and glamorosity alert at all times, even in the loo.

I must be prepared. But no one must know. I must exude glamour but in a natural just-tumbled-out-of-bed way.

So just a hint of foundation, lurker eradicator, touch of bronzer, and leave it at that.

Oh yes, and a touch of lip gloss, mascara and a tiny bit of eyeliner.

I don't suppose they would both consider a time-share girlfriend..."